Friendships. Relationships. Many other associations with ppl around u. Everyone has these in his/her life. Some have more, some less. Some are blessed 'coz they have some real good quality ppl in their lives. Some, on the other hand, are not so blessed. Call it fate, or whatever pleases u.
Now, when u r into any of these (frndships, relationships etc.), the one most important thing that everyone advises u, and which sooner or later dawns upon u, is that u hv to give each other the proper time and space, so that both ppl concerned do not feel suffocated or cramped, and they get the required respect they deserve.
In every such equation that u share with others, some conflicts are bound to happen. They might be over big issues, or over very petty things. Sometimes they just happen, maybe because the lack of it. (U know, just becoz there hvnt been any conflicts or disagreements for a long time, they happen.) And there is this strong belief in my head that for any relationship to actually grow, certain disagreements and conflicts are very much required.
But certain things again hv to be kept in mind. "How much" is the question. If u can strike a balance there, nothing can go wrong. Obviously, things are not 100% under ur control, but then by knowing this balance, u can eliminate most of the chances of things goin' wrong.
Then again, this is NOT the only balance that has to be maintained. Hereafter comes the bundle of the two most important things that have to be taken care of.
1. Space.
2. Time.
Well, I am not talkin' abt the concepts of physics here, even though it might seem like that. (Listing the two points like that reminds me of my old physics workbook that I had in school!!)
Space is a very complicated term, yet very simple. Some people understand its meaning very clearly, some do not. Then there are some who have to be educated in this aspect.
Some people are naturally very good at giving others around them a lot of space. Sometimes so much, that people might spill out too! But usually, they just give the right amount required.
Some people, on the other hand, are not so good at it. They feel the other people a little cramped. They don't give them any space to think, to act, to react. This becomes a little taxing for almost all of the people involved. This situation, if left unchecked and unamended, might lead to grave consequences. The occurance of the word "grave" here is not a coincidence. It finally leads the frndship/relationship to the grave, not at all resting in peace.
The second aspect is Time. Again, the two kinds of people that I was talkin' abt in the preceding paragraph are to be found in this situation. Time IS required by one and all to make anything work for them. Time to think, to analyse, to like, to hate, to feel guilty... Thousands of things require time.
The one thing that matters after all this is that how much of both the elements should be given and taken by both the sides concerned? Do we take out time to think abt it?
I'm sure most of us have seen splendid friendships being formed because of the proper balance, and many being completely destroyed, either slowly or rapidly.
Isn't it?
It would be good if u wud think a little on this. I am sure certain things could be corrected, if there IS anything going wrong at all.
Right?
Will write more on this soon. Til that time, keep ur eyes comin' back.
© Prateek Sharma Mar 2006
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